A521.8.4.RB_OyeyemiOlusanya

Making Contact

The only way to begin a conversation is to start talking. It’s safe to assume that other people want and enjoy contact just as you do McKay et al., (2009, P. 2815). This has always been my practice right from my youth, some say I talk too much but many said they enjoy my company whenever I contribute to their conversation. This has made it easy for me to engage any stranger in conversation. Even though I still feel shy to initiate a conversation with strangers in many occasion, but I am found of penetrating them through what McKay et al., called ice breaker unknowing. When searching for an ice breaker, two things to watch for are similarities and differences McKay et al., (2009, P. 2843).

Similarity has been so helpful to me in engaging people most especially opposite sex in conversation that some leads to a longer relationship. I could remember the relationship with my high school girl friend which emanated from sharing choir notebook. It all started the day I saw her with a choir notebook. I asked to see the book and latter showed her mine. So we are both choir from different churches, then we started sharing music and latter resulted to a relationship that almost resulted in a marriage.

Differences has initiated a lot of arguments with strangers that resulted in friendship and at times getting closer to a new co-workers or person meeting in a bus for the first time.

In many occasion the discussion started with government issues when I was in Nigeria. We begin the argument about politics whenever I am on a journey inside a commercial vehicle where most people will be contributing their different opinion, in many cases it ends up in personal inquiries of the stranger sitting next to me.

In 2003, I was in my final year of my first degree on my way to Abuja from Ilorin Kwara Nigeria, I was sitting next to a beautiful charming lady whom I love to chat with during the journey. The discussion started on government lapses, many people on the bus were contributing their differences, arguing, including the lady sitting next to me and me. The discussion ends up on personal information inquiries among us. Fortunately, we were from the same school a second year student and an aspiring member of drama group that I was the current president. She was highly delighted to meet the president of her dream group. I gave her all she needs to become a full member and exchange each others contact.

This was a lady that ordinarily I taught was of high class to engage in conversation, I might not be bold enough to talk to her if not because of the discussion. That day mark the beginning of our friendship till I graduated. Conversation is the art of combining questions, active listening, and self-disclosure in such a way that people keep talking and enjoy it……basic rule of conversation is to ply McKay et al., (2009, P. 2913).

Reference:

McKay, M., Davis, D., & Fanning, P. (2009). Messages. Oakland, CA.